Rideau Hall asks bored Governor General if she could scale back her backyard rocket-building program
OTTAWA – Officials at the Governor General’s residency has asked Canada’s vice regal to scale back her ambitious space race side-project and return to the more traditional ceremonial duties…
BREAKING: Baby not done pooping
EDMONTON – Local couple, Doug and Sandra Tisdale, uncovered a horrifying development during a recent diaper change of their daughter Lana when they learned that Lana was shockingly still in the m…
5 books to hold on your commute while you think about quitting your job
Commuting can be a peaceful transitory period for busy professionals. It’s a chance to listen to your favourite podcast, swallow sadly, and hold a book in your hands while reading the same page o…
BREAKING: Leo and Pisces on date
THUNDER BAY, ON – Locals are in an uproar with sightings of known Pisces Savana Jennings and Patrick Alaster – a Leo – going on a date. “When we found out that Savana had asked …
Travel Tips from someone who went to Europe seven years ago
As Hans Christian Andersen famously wrote, “To travel is to live”. There is no better experience in life than discovering new parts of the world. But the discovery may be challenging if you are u…
Canada geese crossing highway fully aware of traffic jam they’re causing
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Public beheading of Ticketmaster execs already sold out
LAS VEGAS – After a damning investigative report by CBC News/Toronto Star revealed collusion between Ticketmaster and scalpers, the company’s shareholders took the rare step of ordering the…
7 US Presidents throughout history and the Nintendo characters their penises resemble
Following Stormy Daniels’ description of President Trump’s penis as looking like the mushroom shaped Toad in her new book, Full Disclosure, historians are reminding the public of the varying arra…
Citywide diffuser malfunctions blanket Vancouver in endless sandalwood fog
VANCOUVER – A cascading series of errors in Vancouver’s diffusors has resulted in a thick, seemingly permanent sandalwood fog settling over the city. “The whole city smells like that bath s…
Doug Ford insists he has always been a huge fan of unelected, activist judges
TORONTO — With the Court Of Appeal granting the PC government’s request for a stay and paving the way for Toronto Council to be cut in half, Premier Ford is loudly insisting that he is and …
