YELLOWKNIFE – Polls indicate that a majority of Canadians would accept the results of today’s legislative election in NWT if it replaced the federal vote later this month.
87% of exhausted Canadians appeared to be all but happy with allowing Northerners they’ve never heard of take the reins of power in Ottawa if it would stop a nauseating federal election campaign.
“[NWT] Legislature Candidates appear to be more qualified than a guy who lies about being an insurance broker,” said Fiona Crisp of Toronto. “And none of them have been seen in blackface or brownface, so that’s a bonus.”
Canadians agreed that candidates like the ones in the Range Lake constituency such as Caroline Cochrane or Hughie Graham will not be disappointing like Elizabeth May or Jagmeet Singh.
89% of Canadians say reducing the number of representatives from 338 to 16 would be “efficient” or “very efficient” if it meant an end to those damned commercials or obnoxious text messages from “Sarah” about the carbon tax.
“No political parties? Consensus government? Am I hearing this right?” asked Mohammed Bukhari of Calgary in amazement of how elected members work together in Canada’s most populous territory. “I will happily accept their leader whoever that is when the Legislature in Whitehorse determines it. Or is that Nunavut?”
The poll also indicated a full 100% of Canadains would support a NWT government placing People’s Party of Canada leader Maxime Bernier on a breakaway ice floe to see if climate change really is a thing.