OTTAWA – Despite poll after poll showing him trailing badly to Mark Carney in the question of who Canadians want to see as the next PM, Conservative Leader Pierre Poilievre is confident the voters will come around once they finally get to know him.
“I know it’s not ideal that most Canadians have a higher regard for the Rogers corporation, mosquito bites and juvenile diabetes than they do for me personally,” said Poilievre. “But I’ve only been Opposition Leader for 4 years. There’s plenty of time to turn this around.”
“Maybe if I do a few more podcasts,” he added.
Poilievre and his team have been hard at work thinking of ways to let the average voter get to know “the real Pierre.” Not just the politician, but the man who enjoys taxidermy, and has a large collection of t-shirts one size too small.
This will include behind the scenes videos of Poilievre practicing his smirk, testimonials about Pierre from his family and friend as well as a daily video journal that will mostly just be clips of him working out.
It’s all part of a strategy the Conservative Party is calling “un-pivoting.”
“The first few years, we were too worried about likeability. Now I think it’s really time to ‘let Poilievre be Poilievre,” said advisor Jenni Byrne.
At press time Mark Carney was getting a bit bored with playing Prime Minister on easy mode.
