JERUSALEM – Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu has announced that he has definitive proof that Gaza protesters were attempting to acquire pebbles of mass destruction, which justified…
World
Suits actor Meghan Markle to marry man living off government assistance
WESTMINSTER – Actress Meghan Markle, who is best known from the television series Suits, is engaged to Henry Charles Albert David who, along with many of his family, is living on government…
Trump announces re-launch of Iranian nuclear weapons program
WASHINGTON – US President Donald Trump has announced that he will be re-launching Iran’s stalled nuclear weapons program after years of very little progress. “Iran deserves another shot at …
Old guy in hostel wants to know what you’re up to tonight
PRAGUE – Sources inside Sr. Toby’s Hostel have advised that Petrov, the white haired man who has been hanging out in the common area every time you’ve been it, would like to know what your …
Oops! Netanyahu accidentally revealed Israel’s secret nuclear arsenal instead of evidence on Iran’s program
There was a big mix-up in Israel yesterday after the Prime Minister’s theatrical presentation on Iran’s super secret nuclear threat featured intelligence reports and images of Israel’s super secr…
Chimpanzee election for alpha-male marred by accusations of feces-throwing
GOMBE STREAM NATIONAL PARK, TZ – A troop election for the new alpha-male has turned sour after both campaign teams have accused the other of feces-throwing and biting. “This is a desperate …
Baha Men abandon multi-year investigation into who let the dogs out
NASSAU, BAHAMAS – After beginning a fruitless investigation into the identity of the person (or persons) who released 48 dogs from a Bahaman dog pound during a party in March 2000, internat…
Canadian tourist in London unsure if street hawker is selling authentic Royal Babies
LONDON – Despite the British vendor’s persuasive arguments, Canadian tourist Eric Forte remains unconvinced that the street merchant is actually selling the biological children of Kate Midd…
Tourists devastated by senseless photobombing
VENICE, ITALY – A total of 41 visitors to the city of Venice were tragically photobombed earlier today according to local authorities. In a Facebook post 19 year old Queens University stude…
Trump eager to turn away Syrian refugees he’s currently creating
WASHINGTON — After calling for airstrikes on three government sites in Syria, President Trump is reportedly most excited about the prospect of denying refugee status to the untold Syrian ci…
