BERLIN ― New research from the Berlin University of the Arts has revealed that those with the greatest tendency to play music at maximum volume on subways, in college dorms, and while biking thro…
Entertainment
Local man pulls fire alarm to avoid friends discovering he doesn’t like Succession
VICTORIA, BC – During a recent lunch at Burke’s Cafe, local paralegal Marc Antwern felt he had no choice but to pull a fire alarm to avoid his friends discovering that he does not like HBO’…
God announces long awaited Golden Girls reunion special
HEAVEN – After years of speculation from fans, God announced today the highly anticipated Golden Girls reunion special is now available for subscribers of Heaven. “We’ve been wa…
Look who’s joining the cast of season 2 of Bridgerton: the Ask Jeeves butler
HOLLYWOOD – The season 2 cast of the Netflix breakout show Bridgerton has been released, announcing new comer: the Ask Jeeves Butler. Best known for his work as the gentleman’s gentle…
Arts editor slamming fist on desk wants ‘film reviews of Spider-Man, dammit
NEW YORK – H. Henry Harrison, the arts and film editor of the Daily Trumpeter, was heard yelling across the newsroom Thursday that he ‘needed film reviews of Spider-Man’ and he ‘needed them…
Band reunites to play worst album in its entirety
TORONTO – Yesterday, seminal pop-punk act The Pressgang announced the band will reunite next February to play Elipsis – the group’s objectively worst album – in its entire…
Funeral organist already sweating nervously in anticipation of Sondheim memorial
NEW YORK – Following the death of American musical theater legend Stephen Sondheim at age 91, the organist at the Midtown Synagogue is reportedly “sweating bullets” while attempting to prac…
Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade ends in horror when robe of Baby Yoda balloon falls open, revealing massive genitalia
NEW YORK CITY – Cheers turned to screams today at Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade when a robe malfunction resulted in the Baby Yoda balloon exposing his no-longer-private parts to thousands …
Nickelodeon launching new kids show “That’s Problematic!”
NEW YORK – Leading Nickelodeon’s fall lineup is a new kids show, “That’s Problematic!” The show presents and addresses a myriad of issues that were accepted uncritically by previous generat…
True crime podcasters running out of ways to segue from life-ruining event to mattress commercial
WINNIPEG – Hosts of the smash-hit podcast “A Murder Most Un-Lit” have become mired in one of the most common foibles of true crime fame – the struggle to naturally segue from the rete…