Local Archives - The Beaverton


Unemployed man thinks hockey player lacks hustle

LETHBRIDGE, AB – During a hockey game Tuesday, local unemployed man Gareth Krag became quite outspoken about the lack of hustle shown by players on both teams. Over the 3 hour broadcast, he…


Everyone super impressed by big bathtub

Oakville, ON – After taking a group of friends and relatives on a tour of his recently renovated house, Tom H. Fulton, 56, was pleased to observe several “oohs” and “aahs” at the reveal of …


Local man still slipping

OTTAWA – Martin Hendricks, 43, emerged from his house this morning and immediately began slipping on the ice build up on his driveway, only for the process of him falling to go on for an un…


Psychopath still wishing everyone Happy New Year

HAMILTON – Although it is now well into January, local maniac Andy Gerhard is still going around wishing people a “Happy New Year.” “It came up completely out of the blue,” said Gerha…