While we’re all overwhelmed by the dreary news of a global pandemic, upstairs Vancouver neighbour Elizabeth Caza is turning Covid into “Goal-Vid!” by practicing her vocal exercises for hours! Elizabet...
“Humans are the real problem,” posts man who is the real problem
WINDSOR – Bartender Steve Atkins posted a picture of swans swimming in the Venice canals on Facebook yesterday with the caption, “The animals of the world are returning. Humans are the real prob...
“I think…sorry…I think that…what? No you go ahead,” says man during zoom meeting
Timmins, ON – Local man Frank Butler is finding it difficult to jump in during his work’s weekly zoom check in meeting, prompting him to repeatedly start talking and then stop when he real...
Local couple announces the birth of a new puzzle, another on the way
SARNIA, ON – Local couple Carla and Joseph Hangar took to social media this week to welcome a new addition to their family – a completed puzzle of a pastoral landscape – and added that ano...
Delusional sports bar owner believes customers will order from his takeout menu
CALGARY – Completely misreading his clientele, the owner of Nutter’s Sports Bar and Grill believes there will be high demand for the unremarkable items on his takeout menu. Brad Furst’s 17th Avenue ba...
Doug Ford rattles bars on cell as imposter continues to competently manage COVID-19 pandemic
TORONTO – An increasingly enraged Premier Doug Ford has taken to shaking the bars on his cage as he is forced to watch an imposter competently manage Ontario’s COVID-19 pandemic response. ...
“It’s five o’clock somewhere,” chants self-isolating woman three times into mirror to summon wine delivery
TORONTO – As lockdown-induced boredom sets in across Canada, many people are turning to alcohol to liven up their socially-isolated lives. When faced with long LCBO lines and expensive delivery fees, ...
North Korean officials claim Kim Jong-un not dead, just messy bitch who loves drama
Pyongyang, North Korea – Kim Jong-un’s disappearance from the public eye has raised eyebrows about the North Korean leader’s health, even going so far as to assume he is dead. However, a s...
Saskatchewan, New Brunswick loosen restrictions after being declared non-essential provinces
REGINA/FREDERICTON – The Premiers of Saskatchewan and New Brunswick have announced they will be the first provinces to loosen lockdown restrictions after declaring their provinces as non-essenti...
Health workers agree being called a hero more effective than personal protective equipment
TORONTO – As COVID-19 continues to spread around the world, many hospitals are experiencing severe shortages of personal protective equipment needed to shield health care workers from the virus. Lucki...
