FREDERICTON – Today officials with the New Brunswick Government notified the parents of Blaine Higgs, which they are required to do according to Policy 713, to inform them that Higgs name i…
New Brunswick
Breaking: New Brunswick and Nova Scotia NOT the same place
Moncton or Sydney – This is a high priority announcement to all Canadians. In a surprise that has floored the nation, New Brunswick and Nova Scotia are NOT the same place! The confusion can…
Atlantic Canadians finally learn the secret ingredient in Chris Brothers pepperoni: Chris’s Brother
HALIFAX – The Atlantic provinces are abuzz at the news that the region’s favourite deli, Chris Brothers, has finally revealed the secret to its famed pepperoni: Chris’s brother. Speaking fr…
New Brunswick purchases Super Bowl ad by selling Moncton
FREDERICTON – During tonight’s Super Bowl broadcast viewers will see a new ad encouraging tourists to visit scenic New Brunswick, which the province financed by selling off the city of Monc…
Guy giving urine sample can’t stop peeing
FREDERICTON – Onlookers are stunned as local software engineer Tyler Fontaine has spent the last 6 days continuously urinating into a medical sample cup. For the past 140 hours, staff and o…
Fredericton rager still going on at 9:15pm
FREDERICTON, NB – Guests at a wild party happening on Fredericton’s Main Street appear to be dead set on burning the three-hours-to-midnight oil as the bash is now entering its third hour a…
New Brunswick orders government employees to hover 2 m above ground to avoid Indigenous land claims
FREDERICTON – In a leaked memo from New Brunswick’s minister of justice, all provincial employees have been ordered to levitate at least 2 meters above the ground to avoid complicating the …
Nova Scotia announces new measures to contain the spread of New Brunswickers
HALIFAX – In a surprise move, the province of Nova Scotia has announced additional restrictions at its border, aimed at containing the spread of New Brunswickers. “We know that these new re…
Jacob unveils plans to eat that for a dollar
MONCTON, NB – Speaking to an assembled crowd outside of his 2nd grade classroom, 8-year-old Jacob Moir has announced that he intends to eat any substance his classmates can name and provide…
Saskatchewan, New Brunswick loosen restrictions after being declared non-essential provinces
REGINA/FREDERICTON – The Premiers of Saskatchewan and New Brunswick have announced they will be the first provinces to loosen lockdown restrictions after declaring their provinces as non-es…
