Local woman trying to break it off gently with LUSH employee
TORONTO – Despite being together for the past 3 years, civil engineer Hannah Stussman has decided to end her customer/sales ambassador relationship with Lush employee Mariam Hadaddi. “It st…
NRA loses sponsorship deal with Henderson’s Child-Sized Coffins
FAIRFAX, VA — In the wake of the Parkland, FL school shooting and subsequent public outcry, the NRA has lost several major sponsors including their latest: Henderson’s Child-Sized Coffins. …
Trudeau invests in Confederate Soldier’s uniform for next visit to White House
OTTAWA – After being photographed in a traditional sherwani on his trip to India, Justin Trudeau is committing to dressing for his surroundings by purchasing an authentic Confederate soldier’s un…
Hyper-realistic historical village only fun for affluent white man
TORONTO – While his wife and children suffered immense misfortune and strife, Tim Bailey, 48, the patriarch of an affluent caucasian family of four, is said to have had an absolutely lovely…
Bitcoin is a dangerous bubble, unlike the safe, secure bubble of Toronto real estate
BY: STEVEN SANDERS, Toronto homeowner The short sighted, short term investing that has led to bitcoin value rapidly rising is bad for the economy, and I know a bunch about money because my Toront…
Exclusive: New Avengers movie to feature scene not shown in trailers
NEW YORK – Marvel Entertainment announced today that Avengers: Infinity War, the latest entry in its popular superhero franchise, will feature some content not shown in the trailers. “We ar…
Vatican City Olympic team stripped of medals after testing positive for performance-enhancing God
PYEONGCHANG – The Papal Olympic team is mired in controversy after a recent IOC test revealed the entire team has been using banned celestial beings during the 2018 Pyeongchang games. “When…
Ottawa Senators head into trade deadline looking to acquire dedicated fan base
OTTAWA – With the NHL’s trade deadline rapidly approaching, franchises are looking to improve the strength of their team by any means necessary. For the Ottawa Senators this means heading i…
Valerie Plante approval rating drops after she bans running down cyclists on Mount Royal
MONTREAL — Recently elected Montreal mayor Valerie Plante’s approval rating has plummeted once again after announcing a controversial ban against driving your car into, and running o…
Canada’s men’s hockey team could not bear the shame of defeat, so they had a zamboni run them over
One of the amazing things about the Olympics is the emotional journey it takes us on. For every gold medal triumph, there is heartbreaking disappointment. After losing to Germany in the semifinal…
