MISSISSAUGA — Kristin has been out of work since the start of the COVID-19 pandemic, and has been receiving $2000 monthly payments as part of the Canada Emergency Response Benefit. She recently agreed...
Rookie MLB player achieves dream of playing in front of 45,000 empty seats
NEW YORK – Yankees rookie Chris Buford realised a lifelong dream yesterday after stepping onto the field in front of more than 45,000 empty plastic seats in his MLB debut. “It’s incredible,” the...
COVID first thing Nova Scotia happy to be only province without
HALIFAX – After decades of being the only province in Canada without several attractions, amenities, and chain stores, the COVID-19 virus has emerged as the first thing Nova Scotians are actuall...
Americans fleeing COVID try to sneak into Canada by disguising themselves as NHL players
DETROIT/WINDSOR BORDER – As NHL teams have made the journey to the league’s two bubble cities of Edmonton and Toronto, many Americans attempting to escape the pandemic have taken to disguising t...
WE charity sends Trudeau, Morneau on volunteer trip to Guatemala to self-discover ethics
GUATEMALA CITY – WE Charity is sending Prime Minister Justin Trudeau and Finance Minister Bill Morneau on a volunteer trip to help the poor, explore new cultures, and self-discover their ethics....
Report: man who flossed two nights in a row finally has gotten life back together
CALGARY – In a big win, 32-year-old Dave Frescos has finally managed to gather the internal strength necessary to floss for two nights in a row after weeks quarantined alone in a basement apartm...
Guy who won’t wear mask in store promises to pull out before he coughs
TORONTO – After a small business owner reminded him of the city bylaw mandating people to wear masks in indoor public spaces, local shopper Jason Anguiano insisted that since he doesn’t like the...
Woman late to join Animal Crossing has been making mortgage payments to raccoon outside apartment
THORNHILL, ON – Four months after the release of the wildly popular video game Animal Crossing: New Horizons, Leondra Mendoza sat down with her partner to admit to them that she had been making ...
One Direction reach 10-year anniversary, submit bodies to recycler to make way for fresh crop of heartthrobs
LOS ANGELES – Hit boy-band One Direction are celebrating their 10-year anniversary this week before surrendering their bodies back to the music industry to be recycled. The group was assembled d...
“Hey girl, Class of ’08”: 5 ways to tell if the girl from your high school is messaging you about a cult
We’ve literally all been there. You get a new message from someone you haven’t talked to in a while. You open it. And only then do you realize that it’s that girl from your old high school asking you ...
