Canada holds nationwide beauty pageant to find most effective NAFTA negotiator
OTTAWA – In preparation for the upcoming round of NAFTA renegotiation talks, Canada is searching for the most effective possible negotiator through a nationwide beauty pageant. “We consider…
Hamilton Tiger-Cats lose in practice match against training equipment
HAMILTON – The struggling Hamilton Tiger-Cats was dealt another blow after losing a practice match to their training equipment by a score of 2-0. Many believed that the Ti-Cats (0-7) would …
Quebec Maître D’ stunned as enigmatic tourist greets him in his native tongue
MONTREAL — Jon Dubois, maître d’ of Montreal restaurant Le Poirier, reported feeling shocked earlier this week when an charming yet mysterious woman–who had clearly travelled from a f…
BRT: Trojan Beaver
Why won’t Canada accept a friendly gift from Russia?…
Local woman has now explained meaning of tattoo to everyone she knows
MOOSE JAW, SK – After shoehorning it into a discussion with the downstairs neighbour, Claire Dolby has now told everyone she knows the origin and meaning of her wrist tattoo, in spite of in…
Norfolk Ledger-Dispatch apologizes for error in 1945 headline
NORFOLK, VA – The Norfolk Ledger-Dispatch, the paper of record for Norfolk, Virginia, has issued a correction to a 1945 story that indicated that Nazi organizations were no longer functioni…
QUIZ: Which media descriptor for a white male terrorist are you?
Ever wonder how YOU would be described by the media after committing an act of racially or religiously-motivated terrorism as a white male? Take this quiz and find out, and don’t worry – none of …
Thrifty women organize swap meet to trade unwanted male advice
MONTREAL – Dozens of thrifty women gathered for a swap meet this afternoon, to trade garbage bags full of unwanted male advice each had accumulated over the years. The women met early at a …
Man returns from European vacation with fantastic tales of what they have on Netflix
OTTAWA — Local office temp Ryan Graydon has returned from his first-ever trip to Europe eager to regale his friend with stories of the movies and TV shows available on European Netflix. “So…
Experts: since 2013, Canadian banknotes have had wrong Queen on them
OTTAWA — A group of prominent historians has spoken out this week, condemning the Royal Canadian Mint for a lack of care in the design of the polymer bank notes released in 2013. The group, led b…