WASHINGTON D.C. – In a 5-4 decision the U.S. Supreme Court reversed Roe v. Wade yesterday, holding that women could not be allowed to have abortions because some of the babies would likely grow ...
Rogers releases rainbow coloured $600 cellphone bill for Pride
TORONTO – As Pride Month heats up and companies across Canada express their support for the LGBTQ+ community, one of Canada’s largest telecom providers has rolled out their latest pride month in...
All guns reclassified as Chekhov’s guns
OTTAWA – Following a new survey that found that 99.9% of firearms turn out to be important to the plot, the Federal government has issued a nationwide reclassification of all privately owned fir...
Canadian women rest easy in the knowledge misogyny uniquely American problem
OTTAWA – Across the nation, women are reacting to today’s horrifying news that the U.S. Supreme Court has struck down Roe v. Wade with compassion for their American counterparts, but are taking comfor...
Centrist gazelle pauses to consider cheetah’s point of view
BOTSWANA – Marvin Shuttleworth, a three-year-old gazelle who proudly describes himself as a centrist, paused while being pursued by a cheetah in order to consider the predator’s point of view. S...
Lightning devastated to learn Refs can work against them too
Tampa Bay, FL – In the wake of Nazem Kadri’s game winning goal for the Avalanche in Game 4 of the Stanley Cup finals being allowed despite the Avs having too many men on the ice, Tampa Bay...
OP-ED: You wearing a mask actually is infringing on my freedom by making me feel guilty and selfish
NOTE: The author of this op-ed has requested to remain anonymous (But not because I’m not proud of my opinion, okay?) I am a man of principle. It’s important to stick up for what you believe and what ...
Air Fryer latest appliance to fail to save marriage
TRENTON, ON – After buying an air fryer over a year ago, Bobby and Muriel Fuller regret this latest appliance purchase has failed to save their marriage after a string of attempts with other no...
“Did a thing!” posts white woman who has either cut her hair or invaded the nation of Kosovo
WINNIPEG – Friends and family of Jennifer Higgens reacted with trepidation after the 32-year-old tweeted that she “did a thing” this past Saturday afternoon, unsure if their loved one had embark...
