Animal Archives - The Beaverton

Animal

Checks out! Weird guy owns lizard

LINDSAY, ON – In an extremely foreseeable but nonetheless upsetting chain of events, 29-year-old Dan Wilson, a man who can only be described as “weird as hell”, has revealed himself to be t…

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Scientist: Otters are actually just wet dogs

Kingston, ON – A senior researcher at Queen’s University claimed this week that otters don’t exist and are actually just wet dogs. “It all came to me at the cottage,” said zoologist D…

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Amateur magician pulls most of rabbit out of hat

EDMONTON – Rookie magician Marty Merlin has shocked and amazed onlookers at Trevor White’s ninth birthday party by removing most of a rabbit from his top hat. “Behold, Peter the Third in all his …

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