Oh my lovelies, my pretty little Américaines… how far have you fallen? I never could have believed that even after you decided Trump was the man for you, that you would be brought this low.…
Mental health experts recommend eating a block of Parmesan over the sink and lying about it
In these difficult times, many are struggling to maintain good mental health in the face of social isolation and economic uncertainty. Health experts warn that it’s important to make time and spa…
Guy wearing brown cape hopefully just quirky and not some weird new kind of white supremacist
OTTAWA – According to reports, a man spotted wearing a brown cape with a little hood is, dear God let’s hope, just really into Lord of the Rings or something and not wearing this as a kind of sig…
Inspiring! These men aren’t voting for Trump and that’s really how low the bar is at this point
In these challenging times, it’s important to stop and notice people standing up for good and doing the right thing. That’s why we should be grateful that, on the eve of the election, hundreds of…
Trump hoping he just gets fired so he can at least collect unemployment
WASHINGTON, DC – Recent reports have confirmed that President Donald Trump is hoping to get fired so he can at least collect unemployment. “I don’t know how much longer here I’ve got. My boss is …
Study: indoor dining significantly increases risk of servers spitting in your food
OTTAWA – Health Canada has released a study indicating that indoor restaurant dining, particularly in high COVID infection areas, substantially increases the likelihood of servers hocking a big f…
Trump vows to wow RNC audiences by crawling out of their televisions and strangling them
WASHINGTON, D.C. – On Night 4 of the 2020 Republican National Convention, President Donald Trump has promised viewers that he will win their votes once and for all by crawling out of their televi…
Fascinating! Scientists reconstruct what historical figures really looked like and they all look like Steve Buscemi
Ever read about a historical figure and think, gee, what did they actually look like? Well, scientists have gotten to work on creating accurate reconstructions of what some historical figures loo…
Career woman settles
WASHINGTON – Sources confirm that US Senator, former prosecutor and California Attorney General, and lifelong career gal Kamala Harris has finally decided to share her ticket with someone. “Sure,…
Disgusting: This woman says she misses brunch
Okay, this is going to be a tough read, so make sure you’re sitting down. Reports have confirmed that Toronto woman Katie Flenderson, who some are calling the absolute worst human being on the fa…