Green Party condemns former candidate for throwing non-organic pumpkin seeds at Trudeau
HAMILTON – Green Party Leader Elizabeth May is condemning a former candidate of her party for throwing non-organic pumpkin seeds at Prime Minister Justin Trudeau earlier today. According to…
Crybaby Craig can’t handle spicy dip
THUNDER BAY, ON — That insufferable whiner Craig had yet another complaint for party hosts Tim and Samantha, Saturday night, when Craig tried their beloved spicy feta dip. “OoOoooOoo…” repo…
Royale releases new eco-friendly no ply toilet paper
DIEPPE, NB – Royale has unveiled what it calls its most innovative and environmentally friendly consumer household paper product yet: no ply toilet paper. “This is our softest bathroom tiss…
Computer illiterate Ontario government asks grade ten students to fix online literacy test
TORONTO – Ontario government officials are appealing to grade 10 students to help them fix the problems with online Ontario Secondary School Literacy Test since it crashed earlier today. Pa…
Jays end post-season with pop, pizza party in Rogers Centre basement
TORONTO – After a disappointing loss against the Cleveland Indians, this afternoon the Toronto Blue Jays capped off their post-season with a modest pizza party in the basement of the Rogers…
Yukon votes 2016: Party platforms
Yukoners will head to the polls on November 7th to elect 19 members of the Legislative Assembly. Here’s what the four political parties have to offer: The Yukon Party Indigenous Relations: Promis…
Dad fondly remembers faxing dick pic to Mom
BARRIE, ON – During a recent celebration for their 20th wedding anniversary, Barb and Fred Lynch finally shared the touching story of how a faxed dickpic cemented their relationship with th…
Satan confused after some enjoy his cruel act of raisins in cookies
HELL – The devil has expressed frustration and confusion at the fact that some of humanity has appeared to like raisins in cookies, what he considers to be one of his most depraved acts of …
Trudeau celebrates one year in office with #TBT Instagram collage
OTTAWA — Prime Minister Justin Trudeau enthusiastically marked one year in office with a tasteful and sentimental Instagram collage. “What better way to celebrate the Liberal party’s landsl…
Local man repeatedly tries to order pizza on crashing website rather than call human being
FREDERICTON – Local electrical apprentice Mike Brenton is reportedly on his fifth attempt to order pizza on a crashing website, in a desperate attempt to avoid a two-minute phone conversati…
