OTTAWA, ON- Following a recent survey of medical research, a panel of scientists have discovered that the ‘asbestos challenge’ currently trending on social media is not the harmless f…
Culture
Local man replaces entire personality with things he’s heard on podcasts
EDMONTON – After years of constantly listening to podcasts and judiciously keeping himself from any real world experience, local man Jacob Spoots has replaced every facet of his personality…
Japan green-lights “Gundam Seinfeld” as revenge for every shitty US anime remake
TOKYO – Earlier today the nation of Japan formally vocalized its displeasure after years of seeing countless beloved anime features ruined by Hollywood produced live-action remakes, and sta…
Nation could really use Gord Downie’s songwriting to help them process Gord Downie’s death
KINGSTON – Waking up to the news of Gord Downie’s death, the nation was forced to confront the fact that the only thing that could help them deal with this tragedy would be a moving b…
Nation’s women running out of ways to say “YEAH OF COURSE IT’S HAPPENED TO ME!”
OTTAWA – A social media trend created in response to producer Harvey Weinstein’s assault allegations has reportedly exhausted methods for women to say “Yes all women”, “Me too”, “Obviously”…
The Beaverton seeks studio audience members with laughs that sound like a laugh track for live tapings
TORONTO (OK TECHNICALLY SCARBOROUGH BUT WHATEVER) – Award nominated television programme The Beaverton is in need of audience members for live tapings. The only condition? Their laughter mu…
James Corden apologizes for Weinstein jokes by pointing out he is just bad at comedy
LOS ANGELES — After telling several controversial jokes about Harvey Weinstein’s alleged sexual assaults, late night host James Corden apologized by reminding viewers “I have absolutely zer…
Twitter suspends Rose McGowan for not smiling enough
SAN FRANCISCO – American actress and director Rose McGowan was temporarily banned by Twitter this week after making several vocal statements about Harvey Weinstein and those complicit in hi…
Courageous actors speak out against Harvey Weinstein now that he can’t affect their careers
HOLLYWOOD – Showing the fortitude the entertainment industry is known for, numerous actors have come forward to condemn accused sexual predator Harvey Weinstein now that he has no power to …
Grindr update: Headless torso seeks head
VANCOUVER – Local gay hook-up app user h0rse_huñg, whose Grindr profile image features only a naked, headless torso, is reportedly seeking head. While experts speculate that the user may be…
