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TORONTO – Premier Kathleen Wynne has pulled her support for Toronto City Council’s plan to implement road tolls on the Gardiner Expressway and Don Valley Expressway, choosing instead to ali…
Man with devil sticks and toe-shoes undermines gravitas of local rally
Comox, British Columbia – Organizers of a local rally to protect farmland in Parksville from developers were dismayed this weekend to find their event undermined by the presence of a man wi…
Rumours resurface of Louis C.K. cornering women, forcing them to watch ‘Horace & Pete’
TORONTO — In the wake of Louis C.K.’s record-breaking stand-up comedy tour, which included a recent performance at the ACC, ugly rumours have resurfaced involving the beloved comedian exploiting …
You have a chance to punch a Nazi. Do you take it?
You are just a normal, everyday person. But you have an opportunity to be something greater, something a little more Indiana Jonesy. Will you seize the moment and become the hero you know you can…
How To: Join The Radiant Order of King Dragon
A must watch for anyone who wants to get ahead!…
McDonald’s unveils all-day breakfast in Canada to stress-test healthcare system
TORONTO – McDonald’s Canada announced today that it will begin serving all-day breakfast in order to stress-test the country’s socialized healthcare system. The menu will feature a selectio…
Child’s New Year’s resolution to become ninja robot alarmingly successful
WINDSOR, ON – The parents of six-year-old Anthony Parker are both proud and shocked at the speed with which he achieved one of his New Year’s resolutions: “to become a big ninja robot.” Sou…
How Canada Lowers It’s Sexual Assault Numbers
Emma uncovers the disturbing way Canada makes itself seem like a safe country for women. Full story: http://www.thecomedynetwork.ca/Shows/TheBeaverton.…
Quiz: Are you jogging or fleeing?
The wind in your hair. A spike in endorphins. Running is a wonderful thing. But do you know why you are running? Are you jogging or fleeing? Sources Runners on the bridge Forest trail Running sho…
York trustee who used n-word looks exactly like you imagined
WOODBRIDGE – The York Region District School Board was shocked and appalled to hear that one of their trustees used the n-word in a public response to a black mother. That was, until they h…