I hate your small town
BY STUART MCLEAN, HOST OF CBC RADIO’S THE VINYL CAFE After years of travelling across this country we call Canada, from coast to coast to coast, I have seen many things that have amazed me. The l…
Justin Trudeau adjusts kimono, gently knocks at Ban Ki-Moon’s suite for after-hours meeting about UN Security Council seat
NEW YORK CITY–Following the Liberals’ recent push for a Canadian seat on the UN Security Council, sources have confirmed seeing Justin Trudeau waiting in a short, silk robe outside the luxu…
Can you successfully fill out the application form Conservative Party leadership candidates must complete?
With the national Conservative Party elections getting underway, all would be leaders of the opposition must complete the below form in order to run. Take it and see if you’ve got the stuff to fi…
Study: 95% of airport delays caused by someone stopping their true love from boarding plane to take job in San Francisco
A new study has found that 95% of airport delays are caused by someone seeking to stop the love of their lives from getting on a plane to take that job in San Francisco. Further delays are also c…
Toronto Argonauts unveil new mascot “Empty Seat”
TORONTO – As part of a multi-million dollar rebrand of North America’s oldest professional football franchise, the Toronto Argonauts have replaced its previous mascot, “Jason the Masc…
Hilarious! Bashar al-Assad crushes lip sync battle with Jimmy Fallon
NEW YORK – Move over, Beyonce! Because a certain Syrian dictator might just be the new Queen of pop! The internet is abuzz following a hilarious Tonight Show appearance by Bashar al-Assad l…
Statistics Canada study finds 125% of Canadians approve of Trudeau
OTTAWA – Statistics Canada released a study today finding that nearly 44 million Canadians approve of Justin Trudeau and his Liberal government, roughly 25% more than the actual population …
Mad scientist having trouble defending giant laser to grant application board
TORONTO – Despite its obvious practical uses, Dr. Vincent D. Ranged is experiencing some pushback from the grant board on his application for a giant laser. “Yes of course it’s essential fo…
$700,000 spent to honour famed gazebo-lover, Mordecai Richler
MONTREAL — Work has finally been completed on the gazebo located in Mount Royal park to honour late gazebo-lover Mordecai Richler. Richler ism of course, best known for cultivating the respect th…
Chateau Laurier expansion first national treasure to be revamped using Minecraft
OTTAWA – The historic Chateau Laurier Hotel is getting a much needed facelift with the help of Minecraft, a leader in architecture and design. The proposed revamp would see the 660,000 squa…