Friend has more body hair than expected
CALGARY – Reports coming from inside the Goodlife changing room on Heritage Meadows Way are indicating that work friend turned squash partner David Cook has a lot more hair on his back, sho…
How will you celebrate Canada’s 151st Birthday
Every week Beaverton editor-in-chief Luke Gordon Field assembles some of the country’s best comedians and writers to talk, mock and riff their way through the news of the week. Then he puts…
Guantanamo Bay touts success story of child soldier turned multi-millionaire
GUANTANAMO BAY – The US Defense Department is praising its own prison system after a former child soldier imprisoned at Guantanamo Bay became a multi-millionaire yesterday when the Supreme …
I’ve kidnapped the Lay’s CEO’s family, and he still won’t bring back original BBQ
Editorial by Freddy Keene Let me just start off by saying that I love Lay’s original BBQ potato chips. I was heartbroken when they changed to the Masterpiece recipe back in the early 00’s, and I’…
Hundreds still waiting in line for Parliament Hill’s Canada Day celebrations
OTTAWA – As many returned to work today in Canada’s capital, hundreds more were still patiently waiting in line to check out the Canada 150 celebrations on Parliament Hill three days after …
Peter Mansbridge lands lead anchor on Naked News
TORONTO – After retiring from the CBC’s flagship broadcast news program, The National, journalist and Canadian icon Peter Mansbridge has taken a new job as lead nude anchor on the Toronto-b…
Prison & Politics: Episode 3
Are prison cellphone carriers ripping off the inmates?…
Albertans erect ‘forgotten province’ memorial in wake of Trudeau’s Canada 150 address
EDMONTON – Ensuring that the province will never forget how they were forgotten in a celebratory sesquicentennial speech by the Prime Minister, Albertans have erected a large monument in Ed…
Snowbird pilot grounded after skywriting profanity
MOOSE JAW, SK – A pilot for Canada’s famed aerial demonstration team has been grounded for a week after skywriting a profanity that outraged some locals. The incident occurred during a rout…
The Rebelton Telethon
Help the Rebelton keep the lights on!…