Man suffering heat stroke told not to complain about the heat because it often snows in January

TORONTO – Local man Kevin Meyer, debilitated by the effects of high temperatures, has been repeatedly told by friends and family not to complain about the heat because several months from n…

Scarlett Johansson’s portrayal of trans man considered frontrunner for Best Actress at 2014 Oscars

HOLLYWOOD – The controversial casting of Scarlett Johansson as a trans man in the film Rub & Tug has placed her as the favourite to win the Best Actress award at the 2014 Academy Awards…

Heroic activists convince sexually-harassed woman to come forward by regular-harassing her

OTTAWA – New ground was broken for women in Canada this week, after a team of heroic journalists and politicians convinced a woman groped by the Prime Minister to publicly identify herself follow…

BC mulls updating singing bowl tsunami-warning system

SALT SPRING ISLAND, BC – The British Columbia government is considering updating the province’s tsunami warning system, which consists mostly of New Age white people sounding their Tibetan …

Local small business obviously former Pizza Hut

HALIFAX, NS – Despite now exclusively serving medicines and convenient retail goods, members of the community said that Lee’s Pharmacy on Walt St. is obviously a former Pizza Hut on Sunday,…

Producers of SLĀV cancel show to concentrate on new revue of songs of oppressed white people

MONTREAL – Singer Betty Bonifassi and director Robert Lepage have cancelled the remaining performances of SLĀV, a showcase of slave songs performed and directed primarily by white people, a…

Trump demands Scott Pruitt resignation citing insufficient corruption

WASHINGTON D.C. — President Donald Trump has demanded the resignation of EPA Administrator Scott Pruitt, claiming Pruitt had not shown enough commitment to personal enrichment and graft. De…

Ford vows to treat asylum seekers like his own family

QUEEN’S PARK – Facing criticism for his refusal to help resettle asylum seekers, Ontario Premier Doug Ford has pledged to treat vulnerable refugees with all the care and consideration he has show…

Montreal’s retired Old Port carriage horses relocated to Calgary Stampede chuck wagon races

MONTREAL – A recently announced ban on horse-drawn carriages or “calèches” in the Old Port of Montreal has allowed calèche horses to move on to new and exciting careers in the c…

Report: Fake CRA scamming Canadians much better at collecting taxes than real CRA

OTTAWA – A recent Auditor General report indicates that India-based scam artists posing as the Canada Revenue Agency are much better at collecting tax revenue than the real CRA. “Their tech…