Experts divided on whether women happiest when married, single or mysteriously widowed
VANCOUVER – Following the heated controversy which erupted after the publication of a study showing single women are happier than married women, many experts are now taking on the more comp…
Baby celebrating first birthday just happy so many shapes could make it
MAGOG, QC – One-year-old Grayson Bellesmare announced today via a series of shrieks and babbles his delight that so many different shapes of various colours were able to make it out to his …
Simu Liu breaks barriers as first Mississaugan superhero
SAN DIEGO — Marvel Studios has announced that Chinese-Canadian actor Simu Liu, of Kim’s Convenience, will play the lead in their upcoming film Shang Chi, making this their first film to fea…
Air Canada invokes notwithstanding clause to overturn Air Passenger Bill of Rights
OTTAWA – On the day the landmark Air Passenger Bill of Rights came into effect Canada’s largest airliner, Air Canada, announced it would be invoking the Notwithstanding Clause portion of th…
Celebrating Prime Day Results, Bezos awards all robots one extra squeeze of oil
SEATTLE, WA — Following the record 175 million items sold over the Prime Day Sale this past week, Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos celebrated by giving each warehouse robot one extra squeeze of AmazonBasics…
QUIZ: We should totally grab a coffee sometime! When are you free?
Oh my god, HEY! It’s me, your friend from university! Wow, I can’t believe I ran into you here on the street, of all places! What a crazy coincidence! We haven’t seen each other in, what, five ye…
“I’ll remember where this receipt is” lies man
EDMONTON — “I’ll remember where I put this receipt in case I need to use the warranty on my new phone,” lied local man Aaron Hayes to himself this morning. “This was an expensive purchase, so I w…
5 purses for summer that are just various bags of takeout
With the inauguration of summer comes the inevitable transition from weighted winter sweaters to barely-there-bikinis. But finding the right purse to match your eazy-breezy summer vibe is no easy…
SPCA halts production on live-action Cats movie until all actors are spayed
HOLLYWOOD, CA – Fans of the legendary Broadway musical Cats were thrilled to watch the first trailer for its upcoming live-action film adaptation yesterday, but further production has been …
New photo filter shows what your data will look like when it’s shared with fascist governments
EDMONTON – Fresh on the heels of FaceApp’s popular old-age filter, social media users have discovered a shiny new plaything: ChonkyBrah, an app that shows with uncanny accuracy what it will…
