Cancel culture run rampant: Louis C.K. forced to win a mere Grammy

LAS VEGAS – Louis C.K. has won the Grammy Award for Best Comedy Album, proving once again that cancel culture is out of control in the western world.  “If we, as a society, were serious about reh…

Modern Carmen Sandiego? This woman has 2 airport codes in her Insta bio

TORONTO OR VANCOUVER? – In a move reminiscent of the ever elusive, world-traveling children’s character Carmen Sandiego, Canadian influencer Megan Jones shocked followers yesterday when she…

Touching: This Hollywood movie defies the stereotypes that Hollywood helped set

HOLLYWOOD, CA – Walt Disney Pictures has announced their latest project, The Bear Minimum, an animated coming-of-age movie that breaks the stereotypes they spent years reinforcing because i…

April Fools’ post on friend’s social media somehow less fun in era of constant misinformation

Nelson, BC – A lighthearted fib posted on a friend’s Facebook page failed to generate the intended joyful confusion in even one reader this April Fool’s Day in light of the fact that the in…

Man in Fred Perry polo clarifies he’s still an asshole but just not in that way

MONTREAL – After being the subject of numerous side glances and hushed whispers, local man in a Fred Perry polo Travis McCauley has come forward to clarify he’s still an asshole but just no…

Thousands of Vancouver perverts delight in taking pictures of tree genitalia

VANCOUVER – Thousands of perverts, creeps, and peeping toms have taken countless photos from different angles of tree genitalia and shared them on social media. Scourges of sexual degenerat…

Ontario Conservatives pass law banning people from posting positive COVID tests on social media

TORONTO – As part of their ‘don’t say anything about a 6th wave or we’ll cut you’ approach to managing COVID, Doug Ford and the Conservatives announced a full ban on…

Plastic bag added to bag of plastic bags destined to one day be added to larger bag of plastic bags

CALGARY – According to sources in the Ross household, a plastic bag from this morning’s outing to the grocery store has been stuffed into a larger plastic bag full of plastic bags. “I should real…

Liberals announce plans to continue announcing plans to, one day, cut emission rates

OTTAWA – Justin Trudeau’s Liberals have announced their latest announcement to announce that at some point they will actually announce how they will cut Canada’s emission rates.…

Opinion: this hockey game would be so much better if they just kissed already

By: Chad “The Bear” Powell Oh man! This hockey game is the best thing ever! Goals! Hotdogs! Sitting in the stands cheering! AW SHIT! Are you seeing that? Those all stars are brawling like animals…