Simon Paluck, Author at The Beaverton
Simon Paluck

Writer

Simon Paluck is a writer and director in Toronto. Now read that backwards. Doesn't make sense, right? Right. Instagram: @directedbysimon

(@spaluck)

Sick fuck stores milk carton on its side

Markham, ON – Local man, Mark Hamilton, stores his milk carton on it’s side like a goddamn fucking animal. “It’s just more ergonomic this way,” stated a deranged Hamilton, who wedged the af…

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Report: Casa Loma just some rich guy’s house

TORONTO – After decades of research, local historian Dr. Suraj Burnman has conclusively reported that Casa Loma is just some rich guy’s house. “The way people from Toronto talk about it, yo…

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