Trudeau responds to Trump’s threat of ripping up NAFTA by laminating all trade deals

OTTAWA – After President Donald Trump once again threatened to “rip up” NAFTA, Justin Trudeau has begun laminating all international trade deals as a preventative strategy. “It is my duty to stan…

Local man hates new fantasy series that he’s absolutely going to read all of

CALGARY – After throwing down the first volume in disgust, local man Eric Patel declared that the new fantasy series Swords of Korregon is terrible but that he’s definitely still going to r…

Help, I’m a real journalist but I keep reporting on Justin Trudeau’s photo-ops without asking real questions!

By: Randi Bateman, Reporter I really need your help! I’m a real journalist, but I’m drawn into into the Prime Minister’s PR stunts, take dozens of photos, and report on it without asking a seriou…

Trump appoints Hurricane Harvey head of FEMA

HOUSTON — President Donald Trump has shocked Washington insiders by naming the Category 4 storm currently battering Houston as his head of the disaster relief agency FEMA. At 9:45pm Sunday …

NDP Leadership Ads: Jagmeet Singh

  Our #sponsoredcontent NDP leadership ads kick off with Jagmeet Singh, the candidate who is definitely not just another Justin Trudeau.…

US Open begins with ceremonial janitor throwing tennis balls off the roof

NEW YORK CITY – Marking the start of the US Open, tens of thousands gathered outside the USTA Billie Jean King National Tennis Center Sunday evening to witness the ceremonial janitor throwi…

Get rid of the toxic people in your life by unfriending all the people who post about how to get rid of all the toxic people in your life

We’ve all been there: you wake up one day and see that one of your Facebook friends posted an article from Thought Catalog about 13 things narcissists and sociopaths do to make you sneeze uncontr…

Whitehorse RCMP riot squad deployed to Save-On-Foods opening to quell artisanal bread-related violence

WHITEHORSE – Two dozen RCMP officers wearing heavy riot gear were deployed to the bakery section of the newly opened Save-On-Foods after shoppers became violent over their claims to the las…

Yuppie rat colonies continue gentrification of lower income sewers

TORONTO – As part of Toronto’s continuing trend of gentrification, rats from Rosedale, Forest Hill, and other affluent neighbourhoods have begun colonizing lower income areas througho…

George R.R. Martin stoked to find out how Game of Thrones ends

NEW MEXICO – In a statement given to reporters ahead of the seventh season finale of hit HBO show Game of Thrones, George R. R. Martin (author of the unfinished book series it is based upon…