Phone companies required to block scams except scams by phone companies called ‘deals’

TORONTO – Canada’s telecommunication providers are now required to have systems that prevent scammers from contacting and fleecing their clients unless it’s done by the phone company. Accor…

5 Office Secret Santa Gifts That Are Just A Twenty Dollar Bill

Christmas is a time to let the people in your life know you care through time honoured traditions the most significant of which is agreeing to an office secret Santa gift exchange, realizing you …

House votes to give Senate a good laugh

WASHINGTON — In a move widely believed to be inspired by the good-natured cheer of the holiday season, the House of Representatives voted yesterday to give the Senate a good ol’ chuckle by …

Justin Trudeau orders Santa Claus to avoid Saskatchewan and Alberta

OTTAWA – Still angry over the election results and their threats to separate, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has ordered Santa Claus not to drop off any presents to families living in Saskat…

Weather Alert: Canadians expected to receive up to 8 trivial office conversations about snow

TORONTO – The national weather advisory released a statement today warning Canadians to expect up to 8 pointless office conversations on how much snow had fallen. “I don’t know what the fuc…

“I’m quirky” declared treatable condition by W.H.O.

KINGSTON – Following years of lobbying by Canadian health groups, the World Health Organization has finally recognized that saying “I’m quirky” is a condition that requires medical tr…

Conservative Party demands knowledge back from Scheer’s kids

OTTAWA – The Conservative Party has announced that following Andrew Scheer’s resignation as party leader, they will also be expecting to recoup the knowledge his kids acquired while attendi…

Armoured convoy escorts Caroline Mulroney out of Hamilton

HAMILTON – After announcing the Ford government was cancelling Hamilton’s LRT, Ontario’s Transportation Minister Caroline Mulroney was escorted out of the city. Ten LAV III and two Leopard …

Hallmark CEO reverses decision to pull ads featuring lesbians after being visited by three gay ghosts

STUDIO CITY, CA – Following a magical nocturnal adventure guided by three homosexual Christmas spirits, the president and CEO of Hallmark Cards Inc has publicly apologized for caving into r…

Update: white journalists still not seeing the irony of demanding Wilson-Raybould give office back

OTTAWA – a survey of the dozens of white mainstream media journalists currently writing angry editorials about Jody Wilson Raybould refusing to vacate an office that does not belong to her …