Embarrassing Australian government continues to rage across the country
CANBERRA – Australia remains gripped by a raging and shameless government that appears to be engulfing the nation. Emergency crews and locals have attempted to control Liberal Prime Ministe…
In memoriam: The gloves we lost in 2019
We lost some of humanity’s best gloves and mittens in 2019. Here are just some of the best hand covers that we said good-bye to: Sheep leather glove (left hand) – Lost at the airport …
Editorial: Oscar Season is Heating Up! by a child named Oscar
By Oscar Barnes, Grade 2 Hi! The calendar is flipping to January, and if you love great movies, that means one thing: It’s time to start thinking about Oscar! Because he is hosting a birthday par…
Man trapped in endless loop of diving into infinity pool
EDMONTON – Jacob Quinn, a guest at the Mirage hotel is currently entering his third hour of diving into the infinity pool. “I just waited for him to come up from the water, but he never did…
Netflix password-sharing crackdown reveals just one paid subscriber
LOS GATOS, CA -– Following a new policy designed to strictly limit account-sharing among multiple users, Netflix has discovered that it has always just been one subscriber. The lone paying custom…
Antarctic glacier heard you like your seawater on the rocks
ANTARCTICA – After listening to humanity’s actions and proclamations for the past 60 years, a local Antarctic glacier took the hint and started preparing Earth’s seawater to be served on th…
Orlando rebrands as ‘Orwatero’ in anticipation of climate change
ORWATERO – In an effort to be the first city to recognize the new reality that much of the earth will soon be covered in water, Mayor Buddy Dyer has announced that Orlando, FL is changing i…
Tyler, the Creator to battle Tyler, the Destroyer
LOS ANGELES – Amidst the Field of Trials located deeply within the Destiny Shroud, 4,000 trumpets sounded as rapper and alt-hip hop star Tyler the Creator emerged from the foggy deeps to fight hi…
Canadian holiday tradition of angrily berating teenagers continues
OSTRAVA, CZ – The long-held Canadian holiday tradition of berating 16-to 19-year-olds for losing a hockey game started a few days earlier this year. Fervent displays of the holiday spirit d…
