Trump honestly forgets which debt he’s paying back by pulling troops from Syria
WASHINGTON – As President Trump announced a snap decision to remove US troops from Northern Syria, insiders report the president genuinely cannot recall which authoritarian leader this acti…
Putin impressed Canadian voters don’t need help spreading disinformation
MOSCOW – Russian President Vladimir Putin was impressed at Canadian voters initiative to misinform themselves without the aid of a foreign power. Putin was more than happy not to have lifte…
Climate change skeptic insists earth was booby-trapped to explode from beginning
OTTAWA—Climate change skeptic Herb Gilpin has found increasing support for his theory that climate change, far from being caused by man-made pollutants, is in fact an indication that it is heatin…
Weird couple names their son “John”
OTTAWA – Friends of local couple Blaze and Traylor Davidson have been left perplexed after the Davidsons decided to give their newborn son the completely bizarre name of ”John”. “I can’t believe …
Local woman outraged that restaurant can’t make the meal she just invented
TORONTO – Margaret Jenson was left horrified yesterday after Café Rouge, the French restaurant in which she was having lunch, impertinently informed her that they would be unable to create the di…
Financial experts say millennials will have to save an entire planet to retire
CALGARY – As the millennial generation gets closer to midlife and starts to make retirement plans, financial experts are warning that not only will they have to save twice as much money as …
Disenchanted white men shouldn’t be able to murder people
Director Todd Phillips comes out in defense.…
Top 5 Halloween costumes that are just the Joker you unimaginative white man
As the Halloween season approaches many people spend weeks looking for imaginative, unexpected costumes. Others do not. Beavefeed is here for all those white men who will watch Joaquin Phoenix’s …
Local woman deletes Tinder for the last time for the fifth time this year
TORONTO – Yesterday, Mandy Timmins triumphantly announced to her family, friends, and coworkers that she had just removed the Tinder app from her phone for what she promised will be “the last tim…
Insurance broker scandal leaves nation wondering if Andrew Scheer really even likes milk
When will the lies end?…