Washington, D.C. – Americans are flabbergasted after President Biden within only two weeks was able to undo all four hours of work Trump completed while in office. “I thought it would take us at...
Jonathan Kay pretty sure cancel culture to blame for him using dog shampoo
TORONTO – After his tweet about mistakenly using dog shampoo for several months went viral, Canadian journalist Jonathan Kay has been hard at work explaining how exactly “the cancel culture Twit...
Snowbirds outraged they were only given one year notice on non-essential travel
PALM BEACH, FL – Dozens of Canadian snowbirds are outraged that the federal government only gave them a year to change their annual migratory plans due to the global COVID-19 pandemic. Many clai...
Rescue dog unable to save failing relationship
Hamilton, ON – Jane Rogers and Eric Salts recently discovered that adopting a six-year-old rescue dog was not enough to put off the ending of their four-year relationship. The couple, who are cu...
Canada Post-Punk claims mail’s not dead
REGINA – Despite claims that physical mail has been declining and gone to the wayside the past two decades, a local Canada Post-Punk rebukes the notion, and states that mail’s not dead. “Listen,...
Woman diligently washing vibrator pretty sure she could be a good mom
MONTREAL – While carefully washing her $200 vibrator after use, local woman Maya Shah had the epiphany that it’s very likely she could be a great mother. She has since applied to adopt a child. ...
With Biden in office, Canadian satirists scramble to familiarize selves with Canadian politics
TORONTO – As the political climate in the USA settles with President Joe Biden in office, Satirists and political comedians all across Canada are hurrying to develop even a passing familiarity w...
Group interview takes turn when interviewer places single knife on table
BARRIE, ON – Amanda Torres remembers thinking her group interview for a position at Jenny’s Diner was going well – until her interviewer pulled a carving knife out of her bag. “The manager...
Long term care facilities build runways, take international flights to get Doug Ford’s attention
TORONTO – Ontario’s LTC facilities have been forced to construct their own fake international airports in an attempt to gain Premier Doug Ford’s immediate action on COVID-19 outbreaks. White Pin...
OPINION: I didn’t even want to go outside until the government told me not to
By: Pierre Gagnon, Montreal resident As a wave of new lockdowns and curfews hit Canadians once more, I find myself resigned to living, working, and existing solely in my apartment. In the past, I did ...
