FDA tells American horses to stop taking COVID vaccinations for worm infestations

Silver Spring, MD – The United States Food and Drug Administration has asked American horses to stop taking COVID vaccines to treat their worm infestations. “There is no evidence that COVID…

O’Toole urges Canadians to punish Trudeau for calling election, really punish him, yes, HARDER

RUSSELL, ONT. – At a recent campaign stop, Conservative leader and PM hopeful Erin O’Toole made it clear he wants the Canadian public to absolutely humiliate Trudeau in the election, break …

Jean Chrétien hired as Trudeau’s bodyguard

OTTAWA — In response to violent protesters swarming his personal appearences, Liberal leader Justin Trudeau has hired Jean Chrétien as his personal bodyguard. The 89-year-old has several decades …

Erin O’Toole reverses position he hasn’t announced yet

OTTAWA – In the wake of changing his position on abortion, guns and the carbon tax,  Erin O’Toole has also announced that he no longer plans to sell corporate naming rights to all of …

After Conservatives surge in polls, Trudeau reminds voters he’s also pretty racist

Ottawa, ON – After strong polling numbers showing the Conservative party’s newfound popularity, Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has changed tactics by reminding Canadians he can be j…

Maxime Bernier makes stump speech in ambulance bay

TORONTO – Dozens of PPC supporters joined Maxime Bernier in front of a hospital’s ambulance bay and emergency room where the political leader made his pitch to voters. The angry crowd of ab…

Nostalgic win! This man banged pots for healthcare workers instead of yelling at them

Self-described “nostalgia junkie” Alex Kaur recently turned back the clock when he decided to bang pots in celebration of healthcare workers instead of angrily protesting them. “Every…

Protesters outside of hospital apparently unaware of where laws are made

CALGARY – According to eyewitnesses, a group of anti-vaccine mandate protestors outside of the Foothills Medical Centre appear thoroughly confused as to where or even how Canada passes laws…

Antivaxxer spends day protesting hospital where he’ll spend next month intubated

TORONTO – Local anti-vaccine protestor Brayden Crosby, 32, spent today demonstrating against COVID-19 vaccine mandates outside the hospital where he will coincidentally be admitted for chro…

Workgroup really wishes Gavin and Janice would stop flirting in the Google Doc

VICTORIA – Employees of Hendersin Inc. are getting extremely uncomfortable at the increasingly flirtatious amendments being made by two of their coworkers to a group Google Doc. “I have not…