The Beaverton

Fist-bump proclaimed top broclamation

EDMONTON, AB – After months of data collection, 3000 hours of simulation tests, and a research endowment of over $450,000, top anbropologists at the University of Alberta have proven that t…


Canada issues apology

NEW YORK – A Canadian representative issued an apology on behalf of Canada at a recent United Nations General Assembly meeting. The representative stood up during a heated discussion concer…


China loans Canada two giant pandas

In what is being described as ‘Panda diplomacy,’ The People’s Republic of China has agreed to loan Canada two giant pandas – at a cost of $10 million – as a symbol of goodwill and the…