Yoga instructor who just finished two-week course excited to damage people’s spines
Kitsilano, BC — Newly certified yoga instructor Danielle Neal is looking forward to opening the hearts and warping the spines of members of her community. Neal’s fast-tracked “Power Yoga Tr…
Trying to appeal to suburban Canada, Jagmeet Singh delivers hateful speech against himself
OTTAWA – Attempting to gain the support of the Quebec and Saskatchewan NDP caucuses and assuage fears about his ability to appeal to rural Canadians, Jagmeet Singh used a recent speech to l…
‘Doug is doing the right thing’ says man who would lose his shit if Trudeau invoked the Notwithstanding Clause
Our award winning* podcast returns! Luke explains the reason for the longer than expected hiatus and updates everyone on what’s been going on these past 10 months. Then he and the Panel (Ka…
10 things Doug Ford has already used the notwithstanding clause on
Ontario Premier Doug Ford said he will be using section 33 of the Constitution to overrule a court decision on the size of Toronto Council. However, few know he has used it in 10 other occasions …
“He never tried to eat me,” friends defend cannibal
AJAX, ON — Friends of accused cannibal, Robert Black, are rushing to his defence after a tip to police revealed a freezer full of limbs in the basement of his house. “Look, I know Rob. He’s…
Big city elite retires to their 300 sq foot basement apartment to eat beans
VANCOUVER – Local woman Kaitlin Escada, who based on her location and political views many describe as a ‘big city elite’, is spending her evening sitting in darkness eating beans after her…
Doug Ford invokes notwithstanding clause to ram through legislation releasing all the snakes at the Zoo
TORONTO – Premier Doug Ford has invoked the notwithstanding clause, overriding a judicial ruling that said it was wrong to release thousands of snakes from the Toronto Zoo. “Folks, I was democrat…
Son finds dad’s stash of old hardcore police chase videos
VANCOUVER – Yesterday evening, twelve year old Dylan Kitchener got more than he bargained for while rummaging through his parent’s closet. The impressionable youth stumbled upon a car…
Nation kind of surprised it took Doug Ford this long to eliminate Charter Rights
TORONTO – After Doug Ford’s bombshell announcement that he would use S. 33 of the Constitution to override the Superior Court striking down his decision to eliminate half of the Toronto Cit…
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