TORONTO – A tense standoff is currently taking place on a TTC subway car between its passengers and a guide dog that everyone is desperately trying not to touch. “I’m terrified I’m actually going to d...
Dumbest man you know doing pretty well these days
OTTAWA — College friend Brandon Ward, a man you know to be dumb as bricks, is reportedly doing pretty well these days. According to sources which include Facebook, the Facebook app, and your friend’s ...
Scheer awards carton of chocolate milk medal of bravery for saving son’s life
OTTAWA – At a touching ceremony at Rideau Hall, Opposition Leader Andrew Scheer issued a medal of bravery to a stalwart carton of chocolate milk symbolizing how the dairy product of questionable...
Alberta threatens that it is open to the idea of possibly considering the notion of maybe exploring the concept of seceding from Canada perhaps
CALGARY – A shocking poll has revealed that over half of Albertans are not only not not opposed to the idea of remaining a part of Canada, they are actively considering considering the opposite....
Nation’s architects admit they don’t know what they’re doing
CANADA – The country’s architects have admitted they have no idea what they’re doing when it comes to designing any building. “I just make shit up as I go along,” confessed Lennox Elm who strict...
Uber driver has good chuckle about how he almost killed you both
TORONTO – This week, an Uber driver nearly drove his car into oncoming traffic, then made brief eye contact with you in the rearview mirror while chuckling about it. Rather than pulling over, or even ...
Preview: ‘The Beaverton’ Kicks Off Tuesday At 10/8atl On CTV
Same faces you’ve come to know and love with an all new desk…well a clean desk....
New summer episodes of The Beaverton to finally lay the smackdown on BBQs and cottage weekends
TORONTO – With its third season premiering July 23rd at 10pm on CTV, and episodes running Tuesdays at 10 throughout the summer, tv satire series The Beaverton is finally being given a chance to ...
5 ways to unlock your beach body from the suitcase it washed up in!
It’s the height of summer and you know what that means: patios, fun in the sun, and everyone who’s anyone taking to the BEACH, searching for that perfect beach body. The police are also there, on the ...
PM on Trump’s racist tweets: “Only Quebec is allowed to do that in Canada”
OTTAWA – Prime Minister Justin Trudeau criticized President Donald Trump’s racist tweets towards four congresswomen declaring that Canadians would not tolerate such hateful words and actions unl...
