AUSTIN, TX — On the heels of news that Elon Musk had become Twitter’s single largest shareholder, Tesla Motors has unveiled a new safety feature requiring the driver to demonstrate being capable...
Employer successfully schedules return to office for peak of new COVID wave yet again
TORONTO – Local consulting firm J.P. Binderschlatz & Co. has once again asked it’s 40 employees to return to work in-office right at the peak of the latest COVID wave. “We’...
Cancel culture run rampant: Louis C.K. forced to win a mere Grammy
LAS VEGAS – Louis C.K. has won the Grammy Award for Best Comedy Album, proving once again that cancel culture is out of control in the western world. “If we, as a society, were serious about rehabili...
Modern Carmen Sandiego? This woman has 2 airport codes in her Insta bio
TORONTO OR VANCOUVER? – In a move reminiscent of the ever elusive, world-traveling children’s character Carmen Sandiego, Canadian influencer Megan Jones shocked followers yesterday when she adde...
Touching: This Hollywood movie defies the stereotypes that Hollywood helped set
HOLLYWOOD, CA – Walt Disney Pictures has announced their latest project, The Bear Minimum, an animated coming-of-age movie that breaks the stereotypes they spent years reinforcing because it is ...
April Fools’ post on friend’s social media somehow less fun in era of constant misinformation
Nelson, BC – A lighthearted fib posted on a friend’s Facebook page failed to generate the intended joyful confusion in even one reader this April Fool’s Day in light of the fact that the interne...
Man in Fred Perry polo clarifies he’s still an asshole but just not in that way
MONTREAL – After being the subject of numerous side glances and hushed whispers, local man in a Fred Perry polo Travis McCauley has come forward to clarify he’s still an asshole but just not in ...
Thousands of Vancouver perverts delight in taking pictures of tree genitalia
VANCOUVER – Thousands of perverts, creeps, and peeping toms have taken countless photos from different angles of tree genitalia and shared them on social media. Scourges of sexual degenerates wh...
Ontario Conservatives pass law banning people from posting positive COVID tests on social media
TORONTO – As part of their ‘don’t say anything about a 6th wave or we’ll cut you’ approach to managing COVID, Doug Ford and the Conservatives announced a full ban on shar...
Plastic bag added to bag of plastic bags destined to one day be added to larger bag of plastic bags
CALGARY – According to sources in the Ross household, a plastic bag from this morning’s outing to the grocery store has been stuffed into a larger plastic bag full of plastic bags. “I should really re...
