Horse girl becomes horse dewormer girl
PRINCE ALBERT, SK – 25-year-old mother of two Rebekkah McElroy, once crowned “Lil Miss Horse Princess” in the 2002 Saskatchewan Harvest Fall Festival, has adopted a strict daily regimen of …
Federal party leaders target millennial voters by also not living up to their potential
OTTAWA – With only days left until the federal election, political analysts say party leaders are focused on relating to millennial voters by generally performing a bit worse than everyone …
Video game boss needs you to come in over weekend to finish bonus level
WORLD OF TERRAVAST— Emperor Berros, the great axe-wielding minotaur found at the center of the Labyrinth of Agony, announced today that he “was going to need you to log-in Saturday to complete a …
Province that keeps passing racist laws gets real mad when you call them racist
Quebec City – Quebec, a province which keeps passing racist and discriminatory laws, has been in uproar for a week after debate moderator Shachi Kurl suggested those laws are racist and/or …
Trudeau wistful for past elections when he was just caught wearing blackface
OTTAWA – Sources report that Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has sunk into a bout of profound melancholy due to the conflux of COVID, Afghanistan, China, and unpredictable Conservative support, voc…
Emergency alert warns Albertans of incompetent premier
EDMONTON – Alberta Emergency Alert has issued a critical alert warning residents of an incompentent premier. Smart phones across the province simultaneously lit up with imminent, life threa…
Following emergency lockdown, Jason Kenney announces impromptu apology Stampede
EDMONTON – Following the announcement of strict new measures to combat the out of control spread of COVID-19, Premier Jason Kenney announced he will make it up to Albertans by holding a sur…
FDA tells American horses to stop taking COVID vaccinations for worm infestations
Silver Spring, MD – The United States Food and Drug Administration has asked American horses to stop taking COVID vaccines to treat their worm infestations. “There is no evidence that COVID…
O’Toole urges Canadians to punish Trudeau for calling election, really punish him, yes, HARDER
RUSSELL, ONT. – At a recent campaign stop, Conservative leader and PM hopeful Erin O’Toole made it clear he wants the Canadian public to absolutely humiliate Trudeau in the election, break …
Jean Chrétien hired as Trudeau’s bodyguard
OTTAWA — In response to violent protesters swarming his personal appearences, Liberal leader Justin Trudeau has hired Jean Chrétien as his personal bodyguard. The 89-year-old has several decades …
