Nation doesn’t care enough about Saskatchewan to be embarrassed by it

REGINA – Despite a record high number of COVID-19 cases and a health system on the verge of collapse, polls indicate that not enough Canadians care about Saskatchewan to make it a national …

Oh Shit! The same people in charge of our COVID response are in charge of our Climate Change response

MONTRÉAL – People across Canada are slowly realizing that the people responsible for the handling of the COVID-19 pandemic are also the same people responsible for handling our response to …

Movement to replace O’Toole as leader stalls after Conservatives look at literally any of their other options

OTTAWA – Momentum for the ‘replace O’Toole’ movement that began on election night appears to have petered out after Conservative Party members took a quick glance at any o…

Disturbing UN prediction: by 2030, 80% of all newborns will be named Jackson

NEW YORK CITY- Representatives from the United Nations shocked the world today with the release of a damning report predicting that by the year 2030, 80% of all newborns will be named Jackson. “W…

Doug Ford says he’s saving all the federal COVID money to buy Ontario a pizza party when pandemic ends

TORONTO – As the billions of relief dollars sent to Ontario by the federal government continue to sit unused, Doug Ford is promising all citizens that, when the time is right, he will spend…

Breaking: Cat apparently eats flowers now

REGINA, SK – Household sources are reporting that, as of 8pm last evening, the cat apparently likes to eat decorative flowers now. This stunning feline development was first witnessed by ca…

Toddler slamming on xylophone mistaken for jazz legend

CALGARY – This past Saturday evening, toddler Jacob Williams was mistaken for jazz legend Duke Ellington while slamming on his xylophone. Jacob was gifted the xylophone at his third birthda…

China releases two Michaels, offers Canada loyalty card good for deals on future hostages

BEIJING – Following a deal that resolved charges against Huawei executive Meng Wanzhou, China has released detained Canadians Michael Kovrig and Michael Spavor, and included a complimentary…

Elon Musk splits from Grimes, claims he “needs more Space”

AUSTIN, TX – Sources close to Elon Musk and Grimes have confirmed that the two are separating after Musk confessed that he “needs more time and space – specifically, outer space.” “I …

Alberta demands ‘have-not’ provinces carry their share of its ICU patients

EDMONTON – As Alberta’s COVID hospitalisations hit a record high, Premier Jason Kenney has decried other provinces for not shouldering their fair share of the ICU load.  “This is a ‘have’ provinc…