Hasbro ends all elective games of Operation amid COVID surge
PAWTUCKET, RI – As the US healthcare system struggles under the weight of new Omicron admissions, toy and board game maker Hasbro has announced that all non-critical games of Operation will…
Conservatives demand Trudeau end ‘Freedom Convoy’ protest they fully support and hope continues
OTTAWA – Federal Conservatives are demanding the Trudeau government release a plan to finally bring to an end the Convoy protest that has held Ottawa hostage for over a week, and which they…
Ottawa declares state of emergency, pending approval of lawless mob
OTTAWA – Following 9 days of sustained protesting the City of Ottawa declared a state of emergency Sunday night, pending the approval of the angry horde occupying the city core. “The citize…
5 events to watch at the Olympics which we DEFINITELY remembered were happening
What, they’re still doing that? Like with Omicron and everything? I mean, hello, and welcome to the 2022 Winter Games happening in… wait until Wikipedia refreshes… Beijing! Wait, is that a typo? …
Total hypocrite! This man doesn’t want police to violently attack homeless but does want them to ticket convoy holding city hostage
OTTAWA – Local hypocrite Kai Green has expressed his support for Ottawa police writing tickets for truckers who are making life miserable for residents by honking all day and night, despite…
Date night downgraded to hand stuff night
LETHBRIDGE – According to local sources, Alex and Taylor Shepherd’s plans for a date night have been scaled back to lethargic hand stuff in front of the TV. “I was going to treat Alex to dinner a…
Winter Olympics add new event for cross-country infection
LAUSANNE, SWITZERLAND – In response to growing concerns about the highly-infectious Omicron variant, the International Olympic Committee has opted to do the right thing and add a new event …
Vanilla Ice hopes Spotify notices he also removed his music in Joe Rogan protest
Stockholm, Sweden – After Neil Young has made headlines for removing his music from Spotify in protest of Joe Rogan’s COVID misinformation, Vanilla Ice has removed his music in the hopes so…
Erin O’Toole ousted to make way for new CPC leader: this Fuck Trudeau flag
OTTAWA – Conservative Party leader Erin O’Toole has been removed in a caucus revolt, and will be replaced by a “Fuck Trudeau” flag that one of the MPs found outside Parliament Hill. The sec…
