TORONTO – As millions of Canadians go about their summer, the strains of George Frideric Handel’s Messiah are providing a backdrop to countless barbeques, pool parties, and weekends at the cabin.
“Sometimes an old pop song can re-enter our collective cultural consciousness thanks to a modern cover or an appearance in a blockbuster movie,” said a University of Toronto media studies professor. “And sometimes a baroque masterpiece makes a comeback because it fucking slaps.”
The two hour and 20 minute oratorio, composed in 1741, can be heard blasting out of car stereos, blaring in bars all night long, and pumping up the crowds at baseball and football games.
In Rogers Centre, Blue Jays fans sing “Hallelujah!” in perfect harmony when a run is scored, while pedestrians can’t walk down Yonge Street without cars full of teenagers yelling “Speak ye comfortably to Jerusalem, bitches! Whoo! Every valley shall be exalted as shit!” as they cruise by.
Despite Messiah’s incredible popularity, not everyone is a fan. “I didn’t mind it the first few times it came on the radio at work, but at this point if I hear another soaring tribute to divine love I’m going to scream,” said Heather Ottavino. “Would it kill them to play The Weeknd or Vivaldi instead?”
“Admittedly, I did enjoy Carly Rae Jepsen’s remix,” Ottavino added.
Ottavino’s opinion appears to be in the minority. The Globe and Mail has declared Messiah the song of the summer, while Teen Vogue called it the year’s hottest make out track. Handel’s work is also dominating Canada’s club scene.
“Shoutout to my boy George for this one,” one DJ said, as countless dancers were grinding to its timpani beat. “Now get ready for the sick harpsichord drop!”