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BRAMPTON, ON – Local 20-somethings Brittany McKennah and Lindseigh Tott are showing the world that living out of your van is nothing to be ashamed of, provided you’re hot, rich, and young. …
New Seattle Kraken mascot expected to either fight or mate with Gritty
SEATTLE, WA – Following the unveiling of Buoy, the abomination currently serving as the mascot for the Seattle Krakens, experts have been divided as to how the joyful creature will interact…
Canadians about to elect Pierre Poilievre PM have fun laugh over Liz Truss debacle
OTTAWA – Canadians from coast to coast have spent the last 24 hours enjoying the rapid and chaotic end of Liz Truss’ era as Prime Minister, as they also indicate to pollsters that the…
Anjali Appadurai disqualified from BC NDP leadership race for flagrantly motivating electorate
VICTORIA – B.C. NDP leadership candidate Anjali Appadurai has been disqualified from the race to replace John Horgan after the party executive found she violated policy by brazenly motivati…
Liz Truss resigns after long, illustrious reign of power spanning two British monarchs
LONDON – In a decision that will surely shake Britain and the power structures of the whole Western world, stalwart veteran PM Liz Truss has decided to step down from her long-held seat of power …
World’s worst small-talker asks elevator full of strangers which religion they think is the best
HALIFAX – A sales manager in your building has broken the pleasant quiet of the Monday morning elevator ride to ask a group of strangers yet another deeply inconsiderate personal question. While…
Danielle Smith apologises for not condensing her many apologies into a single efficient apology
EDMONTON – Premier Danielle Smith has held a press conference apologising for the inefficiency of her recent apologies. “I apologised for parroting pro-Putin talking points about Ukraine, and I k…
Crazed pescatarian won’t stop until she tastes the flesh of every known sea creature
SARNIA — Local pescatarian Chelsea Duke has vowed to taste the flesh of every known sea creature, and authorities warn that she should be considered armed and dangerous. “Ms. Duke is believed to …
Canada reaches ‘Doug Ford is now the voice of reason’ levels of political stupidity
OTTAWA – With Doug Ford endorsing the use of the Emergencies Act to end the “Freedom Convoy” protests, Canada has officially become so absurd that Doug Ford is the one providing…
Vancouver actor moves to L.A. to improve odds of getting cast in shows that shoot in Vancouver
VANCOUVER – Local actor Marcus Barrow has made the decision to leave Vancouver and move to L.A. in order to better enhance his career opportunities and secure roles on the numerous film and…