TORONTO – Ontario Premier Doug Ford’s new law requiring everyone in the province to stick an anti-carbon tax decal in the middle of their faces kicks in today.
Officials from the Ministry of the Environment have confirmed that inspectors have been sent out to ensure Ontario’s 14 million residents are complying with the new forehead advertising law. The ads must be plastered on the center of one’s face and be visible in public and private 24 hours a day.
“We want to send a message to the federal government that the carbon tax is suffocating citizens in their everyday life by suffocating them with our political message,” said Environment Minister Rod Phillips.
Reaction to the new law was muffled as Ontarians were unable see or speak through their facial polyvinyl advertising, which Phillips blamed on the federal carbon tax.
Any resident not complying with the law will receive a $10,000 fine and a facial branding of Doug Ford shotgunning a buck-a-beer.