QUEEN’S PARK – Ontario premier Doug Ford has come forward to calm concerns that he is doing nothing, by insisting he and his team are working “day and night” to find a way to screw up…
Tag: Ontario
Ontario vaccination drive first ever government health campaign to succeed in spite of government
TORONTO – As the percentage of Ontarians receiving their second dose increases dramatically, researchers are hailing the event as the first ever government run health campaign to succeed de…
Side effects of trying to book a shot using Ontario’s vaccination system worse than side effects of the vaccines
TORONTO – According to research by Health Canada, the health side effects of trying to book a vaccine appointment using Ontario’s vaccine registration portal are actually worse for yo…
Ontario vaccination registration web-designers unprepared for possibility of people using site
TORONTO – After the provincial vaccination website opened to residents looking to book their second dose became slow, unwieldy, and inaccurate, web-designers hired for the job confronted th…
Thousands of losers wait in line for retail stores rather than have everything shipped to them by evil conglomerate
TORONTO – As retail stores opened in Ontario this weekend, thousands of losers, nobodies and morons chose to stand in line to buy items from retail stores instead of just ordering everythin…
Ontario to allow non-recreational camping trips
QUEEN’S PARK – As part of the province’s reopening plan, the Ontario government announced last week that Ontarians will be allowed to go camping this summer, as long as the trip…
“This isn’t Canada” says man who has said “this isn’t Canada” every other time this happened in Canada
LONDON, ON – After a horrific and premeditated hate-crime took the lives of 4 Muslim people this weekend, local man Dave Travers took to social media to re-assure people that this kind of t…
Ford takes innovative measure of keeping schools closed in July and August
QUEEN’S PARK – Premier Doug Ford made the bold pronouncement this afternoon that the closure of Ontario schools will continue for the remainder of June and – shockingly – extend into July and Aug…
Ontarians thrilled case numbers down to level that would have terrified them in September
ONTARIO – With daily new cases of Covid-19 now consistently falling below 1200, Ontario citizens are celebrating despite the fact that these numbers would have had them peeing their pants b…
IT’S SIMPLE! How to book your vaccine using 8 websites, 5 booking IDs, a decoder ring, and the divine providence of Christ
IT’S SIMPLE! How to book your vaccine using 8 websites, 5 booking IDs, a decoder ring, and the divine providence of Christ Vaccine appointments are opening up for Ontarians 18+! We know you might…