OTTAWA – Inspired by the negative backlash after he shared the address of a random small house that he called “a shack”, Conservative Leader and MP Pierre Poilievre has declared that he wil…
Tag: Featured Post
Quiz: Should you watch Barbie, Oppenheimer or 2008 Canadian WWI drama Passchendaele
It’s the box office battle that has already launched a thousand memes: Barbie v. Oppenheimer v. Paul Gross’ 15 year old First World War melodrama Passchendaele. But how do you know wh…
“Who gives a shit about the CFL?” asks man who recently started watching professional Pickleball
TORONTO – Local man Mark Huntings has expressed his firm belief that the CFL is a niche league that no one actually cares about, unlike the massively popular Major League Pickleball he rece…
5 Concerned Children’s Advertisers commercials that still give you nightmares even as you rapidly approach middle age
If you were a child in the 90s who spent a lot of time watching television (so basically 100% of children in the 90s), you probably still remember that feeling when Ninja Turtles, Reboot or Road …
“The fury of Ra washes over us, and only through sacrifice can He be appeased,” Environment Canada reports
OTTAWA – Lo, the heavens tremble and punish man for his hubris with a calamitous wave of scorching heat capable of rendering our souls from our body and casting them into the shadows of the Duat,…
Canadian politicians ranked by how stupid they look in Cowboy Hats
The Stampede is back, and with it the annual pilgrimage of Canadian politicians looking to do some light cowpoke cosplay because pollsters convinced them that Alberta will only vote for people wh…
Leafs fan only wants most talented player in franchise history to re-sign if it’s at a discount
TORONTO – Demoralized and frustrated by the team’s lack of playoff success, Toronto Maple Leafs fan Mark Montrose says that if Hart, Rocket and Lindsay award winner Auston Matthews is…
Furtive deviant enjoys cold glass of forbidden summer eggnog
CALGARY – According to confidential sources, Jordan Sharpe* has poured himself a tall glass of summer eggnog, despite the risk of harsh judgement from friends and neighbours. (*name changed for h…
Friend has been rich this whole time
TORONTO – Local woman Maddy Humphries, 29, has discovered that her friend Kyla Mason, 28, has been hiding the fact that she is rich for the entirety of their 7 year friendship. “Kyla …
“We’ll be so easy!” promises table about to ruin server’s entire life
TORONTO – In a stunning display of complete lack of self awareness, a group of friends sitting down to eat at Earls assured their server that they would be “Such an easy table!” despite the…
