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TORONTO – Local woman Jess Nguyen, 26, is currently making a considerable amount of money working six part-time jobs, while also slowly dying of fatigue and several untreated illnesses. “It…
Interest rate hike leaves millions of millennials exactly the same
OTTAWA – People under the age of 35 are reeling after a 0.25% hike to the Bank of Canada’s key interest rate left their lives in no way different from before the rate hike. “This rate hike …
Farmer’s market thrown into chaos after every vendor runs for NDP leader
The NDP leadership race is heating up.…
Get excited Millennials: Russian State Television is bringing back “Happy Time with Oksana and Michail”
All you 90’s kids better get hella excited, because you’re about to get hit with a major nostalgia bomb. This week, the All-Russia State Television Company announced that they’re bringing back th…
VIA Rail installs new sadomasochist seats for economy class
MONTREAL – Announcing a new experience for passenger pain and discomfort, VIA Rail has unveiled its new line of sadomasochist seats that will be installed in all economy class cars by 2019.…
Study: 94% of new homeowners not sure what a mortgage actually is
TORONTO – In a surprise set of findings from a Canadian Homeowner’s Association survey, almost all of the nation’s population that owns their own home is completely unaware what a mortgage is, de…
New Netflix program just a live feed of your friends having fun without you
LOS GATOS, CA – Netflix has recently announced its newest slate of programming, including the hotly anticipated binge-worthy show A Live Feed of Your Friends Having Fun Without You, which w…
Barron Trump poised to coast into “smartest son” position
WASHINGTON D.C. – In yet another shift in Donald Trump’s tumultuous administration, young Barron Trump appears set to coast into the role of smartest son to the president of the United Stat…
Prison & Politics: Episode 4
High time for prison electoral reform?…
Police investigating after bodies of thousands of slashed prices found under rubble of demolished Honest Ed’s
TORONTO – Following the demolition of Toronto landmark Honest Ed’s, workers on site have discovered chambers underneath the building filled the mutilated bodies of several thousand prices. …




















