Provincial boundaries renamed ‘Canada-US border’ to make it easier for Canadians to transport liquor
OTTAWA – After Canada’s highest court reaffirmed the rights of provinces to impose fines and confiscate liquor that crosses provincial boundaries, the federal government will rename all pro…
PEI threatens to cut off New Brunswick’s potato shipments unless they approve new potato pipeline
CHARLOTTETOWN – Provincial tensions are high after PEI Premier Wade MacLauchlan said he intends on reducing potato shipments to the province of New Brunswick unless Premier Brian Gallant ap…
Doug Ford vows to fire entire board of Hydro One if elected to board of Hydro One
TORONTO – Ontario PC leader Doug Ford has vowed to fire the CEO and board of Hydro One, once he wins the Hydro One board of directors election he assumes is happening soon. “It has been bro…
Cash prizes for Chase the Ace lottery replaced with access to a family doctor
INVERNESS, NS – A popular lottery game with roots in Cape Breton has swapped its cash jackpots with something that’s more prized in Atlantic Canada; access to a rural family doctor. Partici…
Paying it back: When this paramedic saves someone’s life, he visits them months later to collect on his life-debt
There are few jobs as challenging as being an emergency medical technician. Low pay, long hours, dangerous situations; it takes a certain dedication to help people like that. And for one man in p…
Leather-clad Alberta Marauders threaten to storm BC unless they approve pipeline within 24 hours
VICTORIA – A motley crew of Alberta pipeline crusaders is threatening a full scale war with British Columbia unless they promptly approve safe passage for their precious diluted bitumen. Th…
Ice storm saves conversation with local dad
TORONTO – A brutal late-season ice storm swept through Ontario this weekend, just in time to improve local son James Cougan’s phone conversation with his father. “The storm was pretty nasty, but …
Leafs excited for playoffs to start
TORONTO – After two “friendlies” in Boston, Toronto Maple Leafs Players say they are excited to finally play in the NHL playoffs. “Obviously the warm-up games were fun,…
Andrea Horwath unveils Ontario Liberal’s 2022 election platform
TORONTO – In a powerful speech, Ontario’s NDP leader Andrea Horwath unveiled her party’s platform for the upcoming 2018 provincial election, which will also serve as the Ontario Liberal’s 2…
Man who wasn’t going to leave the house anyway complains about weather
NEWMARKET – Local resident Ed Sanford has apparently seen fit to complain loudly to anyone who will listen about the foul weather outside, despite never having had any pretensions of going out an…
