ANTIFA surprised to discover it is an organization
VARIOUS LOCATIONS AROUND THE WORLD – Following President Donald Trump’s announcement that the United States is designating ANTIFA as a terrorist organization, the loosely connected individu…
Hyper-realistic sex doll will now masturbate itself to orgasm afterwards
SAN DIEGO – A California based company known for its sex toys and other mature playthings has recently announced the launch of their newest sex doll which simulates hyper-realistic sexual e…
White man pretty sure he needs to weigh in on this conversation
TORONTO – As racial tensions rise and the far right attacks the rights of women and the LGBTQ community local Caucasian male Robert Wiser finally feels he has been silent for long enough. “…
“No Makeup” makeup look now just no makeup
NEW YORK – The makeup world is buzzing as beauty bloggers everywhere have revealed that the new way to achieve the perfect “no makeup” makeup look is to not put on any in the first place. “…
Humanity at point where it’s honestly fine with robots taking over
EVERYWHERE – Humans across the globe report a growing consensus that having artificial intelligence ruling the land wouldn’t be such a bad idea. “I really think it’s for the best,” Mary Wilvin of…
Star Wars super fan’s least favourite franchise probably Star Wars
PARENT’S BASEMENT, AB – Local Star Wars fanatic Jake Martin has come to the conclusion that Star Wars is the best franchise he has ever hated with all his heart. “By far the greatest …
Update: More murder hornets imprisoned this year than killer cops
NORTH AMERICA – New research shows that the number of police officers that are apprehended and brought to justice for incidents of police brutality against black people remain criminally lo…
Ancient Canadian curse requires that there must be an Anne of Green Gables remake every five years or else
AVONLEA – An ancient Canadian curse has been discovered on the original manuscript of Anne of Green Gables, demanding the book be adapted every five years, or else. The curse was first disc…
Police seek public’s help identifying looters
American authorities are asking for the public’s help in a nationwide manhunt for two men caught on camera looting during a time of emergency. Witnesses say the men pictured took advantage of a h…
Brave! Instead of feeling bad about getting older, this 50-something constantly shits on young people
As we get older and come to accept the limitations time eventually places on each of us, it can be tempting to become sad or even fatalistic about life. But some of us face the challenges of agin…
