JOSHUA TREE, CA – Brielle Waters, a self-proclaimed feminist who sold pussy hats in her Etsy shop, has reportedly been absent from the Black Lives Matters protests. “Listen, I wanted to be …
U.S.
Medical Workers hoping to receive PPE hand-me-downs from riot police
NEW YORK CITY – In the wake of Black Lives Matter protestors being confronted by heavily armed and even heavier PPE-d riot police, dangerously under-funded medical workers fighting COVID-19…
United States deploys troops to politically unstable nation of the United States
WASHINGTON, DC- The United States government announced today that it will send active duty troops to the chaos plagued country of the United States to help quell the growing civic unrest. “Americ…
ANTIFA surprised to discover it is an organization
VARIOUS LOCATIONS AROUND THE WORLD – Following President Donald Trump’s announcement that the United States is designating ANTIFA as a terrorist organization, the loosely connected individu…
Little Free Library implements more comprehensive Covid-19 strategy than White House
Eugene, OR- Following mounting concern for public safety during the current pandemic, a local Little Free Library is paving the way for appropriate crisis management after issuing a more comprehe…
Justice Department decides doing a crime that you did doesn’t mean you did the crime that you definitely did
WASHINGTON, D.C. – The United States Department of Justice has withdrawn charges against Donald Trump’s former National Security Adviser Michael Flynn. DOJ prosecutors had previously …
Trump frankly disappointed more haven’t died yet
WASHINGTON D.C. — During his latest briefing on the deadly coronavirus pandemic, a frustrated President Trump admitted to reporters that he is “actually kind of annoyed” that the death toll…
Trump pretty sure Tide Pod Challenge will cure COVID-19
WASHINGTON, D.C. – After claiming that UV light and injecting disinfectant might cure the novel coronavirus, President Donald Trump took time from another press conference to speculate that…
“We need to open up the economy and get back to work,” says COVID-19
FLORIDA – Thousands of protestors took to the streets in the United States this past weekend to demand that social distancing rules end and people be allowed to return to work, including CO…
NRA: Guns don’t kill people, schools being open kill people
FAIRFAX, VA – In light of the fact that this March marked the first month without a school shooting in the U.S. since 2002, the National Rifle Association released a statement claiming “Gun…
