TORONTO – Fans may be shelling out thousands for seats to the Leafs playoff opener tonight but they won’t be heading home empty handed now that the club has announced that every atten…
Sports
World’s sick, injured travel to see NHL team doctors after they miraculously heal entire rosters in time for playoffs
LAS VEGAS – People with injuries and illnesses that conventional doctors have been unable to hear have begun making medical pilgrimages to see NHL team doctors after hearing how they were a…
Rogers Centre renovations include private nook where fans can tell Blue Jays mascot everything they can’t say to their dad
TORONTO – As the Toronto Blue Jays play the 2023 season’s first home games, fans are enjoying several offseason additions to the Rogers Centre, including a new bullpen bar, a large family play ar…
NHL fan singing national anthem, honouring soldier with standing ovation thinks Pride Nights are too political
TORONTO – As the debate rages over NHL players refusing to wear Pride jerseys a number of fans have come forward and said they think the Pride Nights are an unwelcome injection of politics …
James Reimer can’t wear Pride jersey due to Christianity even though Bible also bans working on sabbath, coughing up 3 goal lead to Bruins in Game 7
SAN JOSE – Sharks backup goaltender and .895 save percentage holder James Reimer said that he wouldn’t wear a Pride jersey for 10 minutes during warm ups on account of the Bible’…
“Refs totally favour the Leafs,” says man who has presumably closed eyes, plugged ears anytime Toronto plays
CALGARY – Local hockey fan Dave Williamson believes the league’s officiating is regularly biased in favour of the Toronto Maple Leafs, apparently because he has hit himself in the hea…
Fantasy Manager who drafted Tage Thompson won’t shut the fuck up about it
VANCOUVER – Local coworkers are expressing frustration as one member of their fantasy hockey league, Dave Henson in Sales, won’t stop bragging for 10 goddamned seconds about his late-pick d…
Changed O Canada lyrics received with understanding and nuance by nation’s trolls
OTTAWA — Singer Jully Black’s rendition of O Canada at the NBA All-Star game, in which she changed the lyric to “Our home on Native land,” was overwhelmingly and universally well received by the …
REPORT: Oh Fuck! Rihanna still up there!
GLENDALE, AZ – It’s been 12 hours since the end of yesterday’s Superbowl and fans are still reeling over a nail-biting finish, with parties continuing into the early…… oh shit! Did you guys…
New Brunswick purchases Super Bowl ad by selling Moncton
FREDERICTON – During tonight’s Super Bowl broadcast viewers will see a new ad encouraging tourists to visit scenic New Brunswick, which the province financed by selling off the city of Monc…











