BRANTFORD, ON – In an escalating confrontation with a rodent, local resident and amatuer botanist Shelly Hargrove has exhausted her home’s supply of chili powder, turmeric, and other spices…
Saskatchewanians grab keys from Premier Moe despite his insistence that he’s sober enough to re-open province
REGINA – Responsible citizens of Saskatchewan have hid the keys on Premier Scott Moe in order to prevent him from opening up the province without a sober mind. “Don’t worry, I’ll go slow an…
Alberta justice minister investigating federal Liberals, NDP Opposition, media for ties to JFK assassination
EDMONTON – Alberta Justice Minister Kaycee Madu has opened up an investigation into the federal Liberals, NDP Opposition and the media’s role in the 1963 assassination of US President John …
Manitoba moves schools to North Dakota
WINNIPEG – Manitoba Premier Brian Pallister announced all of Manitoba’s schools will be relocated to North Dakota for the remainder of the school year until the province’s pandemic subsides…
NHL claims Tom Wilson was only providing first aid by applying ice surface to opposing players’ head injuries
NEW YORK – The NHL took no further disciplinary action against Washington Capitals player Tom Wilson after claiming the enforcer was merely attempting to apply ice to his opponents’ head in…
Ontario LTC Minister Fullerton in isolation after brief exposure to accountability
TORONTO – Ontario’s Minister of Long Term Care Merrilee Fullerton was rushed out of a media scrum after being briefly exposed to accountability yesterday. The minister will spend the next 1…
People of Alberta forced to launch their own war room lobbying for COVID response
CALGARY – The people of Alberta have announced their own war room which hopes to get the provincial government to take COVID-19 seriously. The new lobby organization, the Alberta People Cen…
Alberta promptly issues emergency alert 14 months later
EDMONTON – Alberta’s UCP government has issued an emergency alert that should have been sent out sometime in early 2020. Acting swiftly to prevent a catastrophe that is already happen…
Scathing auditor’s report on long-term care placed in a home, forgotten about until it dies
TORONTO – The Ontario government has responded to the Auditor General of Ontario’s Special Report on Pandemic Readiness and Response in Long-Term Care by surrendering it to a long-term home…
Progress! Ontarians granted 3 days sick leave to share amongst themselves
Ontarians rejoice! After over a year of tireless advocacy from workers and healthcare advocates, the Ontario government has finally taken a major step in halting the spread of COVID 19 by proposi…
