LONDON – In the wake of The Duke of Edinburgh’s untimely death at the far too young age of 99, British tabloids are wondering how and why his granddaughter-in-law Meghan Markle murdered him…
Netflix adds ‘movies set in New York but it’s obviously Toronto’ category
TORONTO – Netflix is adding a new category of films viewers can scroll through before just choosing to re-watch The Crown: movies set in New York that are obviously Toronto. “We’…
Ford doesn’t understand why eligible Ontarians not registering to get vaccines he insists haven’t been delivered
TORONTO – Faced with questions as to why Ontario is not vaccinating more people, Premier Doug Ford insisted that hundreds of thousands of eligible residents have, for some reason, not signe…
Drug dealer shockingly bad at getting people drugs
TORONTO – With Ontario in the midst of a third wave of the COVID Pandemic, Ontario Premier and former hash dealer Doug Ford has proven to be absolutely terrible at getting residents the pha…
“See, we do let gay men donate blood,” says Canadian Blood Services after quarantine forces thousands to be celibate for a year
OTTAWA – Health Canada and Canadian Blood Services bragged this morning that their controversial ban on accepting blood donations from men who have sex with men (MSM) “is basically no…
Doug Ford reassures Ontarians that vaccines sitting in freezers will be sold at enormous profit
TORONTO – Under pressure for keeping thousands of doses of vaccines in storage rather than administer them, Premier Ford reassured Ontarians this morning that these vaccines will be sold to…
Supreme Court rules carbon tax constitutional after invoking ‘We’re All Gonna Fucking Die’ principle
OTTAWA – The Supreme Court of Canada held that Justin Trudeau’s imposition of the carbon tax was constitutional as a result of the little known ‘if we don’t do something we’re gonna be real…
Ford unwilling to administer vaccines because he has named each one, grown attached
TORONTO – Ontario Premier Doug Ford is unwillingly to administer all the vaccines the federal government has acquired and supplied to Ontario because he has named each one and grown attache…
York Professor asks for a note from a dictator before agreeing to defer student’s exam
TORONTO – York University Professor Emanoil Theodorescu demanded a Myanmar based student produce a note from his country’s dictator before he would grant them a deferral on their midterm ex…
Ford promises Oosterhoff controversy will not distract government from the vital work of bungling vaccine distribution
TORONTO – After Tory MPP and Parliamentary Secretary Sam Oosterhoff gave a speech to a controversial anti-abortion group that recently compared a woman’s right to choose to the Holoca…
