TORONTO – After coronavirus has resulted in the TTC having it’s daily ridership cut in half, TTC employees have reported that they deeply miss the feeling of inconveniencing a million peopl…
Tag: Zoom
Nation’s grandmas ready to bust through the glass and kiss some fucking grandkids
CANADA – The country’s Grandma’s, Bubbies, Oma’s, Nai Nai’s, Abuela’s and Nonna’s are collectively sick of these COVID-19 ‘through the glass visits’ preventing them from kissing their fucki…
Children forced to sit through online church service can’t even fantasize about going home
THE LIVING ROOM – As the Dobson family sits through a Zoom stream of their weekly church service, children Max, Ashley, and Timothy report being robbed of even their usual fantasy of finish…
Optimistic woman only burns June pages of 2020 planner
TORONTO – As provincial governments are taking slow and measured steps towards loosening social distancing regulations, 26 year-old Montana Tremeshko destroyed only the June pages of her 20…
Awkward pause on Zoom call enters third day
VANCOUVER — Tensions are high among the management team of eGrow Marketing as an awkward pause in their Zoom meeting enters its third day. The pause began about 30 minutes into what was supposed …
Report: Nothing accomplished in Zoom meetings as everyone distracted checking themselves out
TORONTO, ONT. – According to a new report published in Business Quarterly magazine, a significant majority of Canadian workplaces confirm that Zoom meetings are increasingly unproductive a…
No one in Zoom Parliament going to tell Andrew Scheer that he is on mute
OTTAWA – As Canadian MPs participated in the second ever zoom parliament, all of them had silently agreed not to tell Leader of the Opposition Andrew Scheer that he has left his mute on and…
“I think…sorry…I think that…what? No you go ahead,” says man during zoom meeting
Timmins, ON – Local man Frank Butler is finding it difficult to jump in during his work’s weekly zoom check in meeting, prompting him to repeatedly start talking and then stop when he…
Local woman discovers date’s numerous red flags over Zoom
CALGARY – A recent first date held over Zoom allowed Olivia Pepta, 28, to see the warning signs and troubling behaviours of her potential suitor without risking infection. With the whole na…
Report: 60% of illuminati can’t figure out how to join video call
WORLDWIDE – Attendance of regularly scheduled Illuminati council meetings have dropped to 40%, largely due to technical issues with the video meeting hosting programs being used. “I mean, I…