We’ve all had days when everything seems to go against you: traffic, bills, your crazy coworkers. And the screeching knot of conjoined rats scrabbling around your bathtub sure knows that feel. But wit...
Hero cat saves entire family from full night of sleep
NANAIMO, BC – The Russell family was saved from another full night of sleep when their cat, Mittens began meowing for no apparent reason at 4 in the morning. “We were all just peacefully laying in our...
What does Jagmeet Singh have to do to win in Quebec?
Jagmeet Singh’s Quebec strategy....
Local artist asked what she actually does
HALIFAX – After meeting a new teammate at a recent pub trivia night, professional sculptor Diana Wagner was asked by fellow player Norman Scheck what she does, only for her answer to be bounced ...
PC culture run amok! This high school had to change their mascot from a smallpox blanket
The latest attack from social justice warriors isn’t on one of our beloved prime ministers but rather something completely innocuous, Lakeside High’s beloved mascot Poxy the Smallpox Blanket. School a...
Liberal housing strategy suggests becoming Prime Minister as quickest way to receive subsidized housing
TORONTO – The federal Liberals recently-announced low-income housing strategy suggests that the fastest way of receiving subsidized housing is by becoming a Canadian Prime Minister. “What we’re ...
Justin Trudeau lets himself go after realizing he is oldest major party leader
OTTAWA – After realizing that he is now the oldest leader of Canada’s three major political parties, Justin Trudeau has stopped his rigorous exercise regimen and started eating every piece of ga...
Liberals attribute Canada’s GDP growth to Justin Trudeau’s side hustle as a social media influencer
Watch this exclusive clip from The Beaverton....
How long will Zimbabwe have to wait for its first female maniacal despot?
By: Rebecca Birch, President of the International Society for Enfranchisement of Women Dictators For a beautiful fleeting moment after Robert Mugabe announced plans to step down, and before he was con...
Whiteout conditions experienced in Montreal mayor’s cabinet
MONTREAL – Montreal is experiencing whiteout conditions at Mayor Valérie Plante’s executive committee causing visibility problems for 30% of the city’s population. Meteorologists say that ...
